Its not about Z this time!

Its 8:45, I am relaxing, and having a nice wine cooler! Zachary is in bed, and Jason is on the couch reading his many work emails that he gets all night long. As I look at my life, I am amazed at how things have changed. I am 30 years old (an adult in some cultures :) !) and it is hard to believe how life has changed. If you told me that I would be where I am today, when I was in college, I probably would have laughed. So where did I think I would be you ask? Don't really know. I knew I would be married and thought by now I would have at least two kids. Can you believe I actually wanted 5 kids! Guess that is the only child in me! I never thought I would still be in Maryland, and expected to be in a cute little house with a big fenced in yard. So your probably thinking, am I disappointed? OF COURSE NOT! No, things are not what I thought, but when are they ever? The highlight of my day now, picking up Zachary from daycare. My highlight 10 years ago? Getting home from work as soon as possible so I could take a nap and get ready to go out!

At work today we were talking about when we were 'younger', early 20's, how we could go out all night and still function the next day. Now, if I have 1 too many, I am completely worthless for at least 24 hours!

Life is good. My only regret in life? Putting all that time and effort into a major in college for something that consists of some small freelance art work as a side job.

So, why am I talking about myself right now I am sure you asking. Thats easy - I just wanted to talk about something that maybe other people could relate to - those without kids - and those that just wanted to know how Jason and I were!

I love my life, it is perfect. No matter how much money you have in your life, or how many friends you have, true happiness is what you make of it. Money doesn't make you happy, because you always want more. We live in a society of greed. Today when I was getting out of my car to take the long walk through the city to work, a man came up to my window and asked for any money - he would take .50. It was sad, and yet I had nothing, except the money I had brought for my lunch. Is it wrong that I didn't give him anything? Guess I was just upset that he had the audacity to simply walk right up and knock on my window!

I keep a journal - the adult version of a diary! It is my life, a way to vent and complain, and rave about about my day. I am using my bog tonight. opening up and sharing with others the strange things that go through my head. I could verge much farther than I am right now - but I don't want to scare you - for those that thought I was actually normal - LOL!

So instead, a night to relax, write about things in my life, and enjoy being a wife, a daughter, and a mom :)